Online you’ll find an abundance of research on personal space and treatment strategies for autistic children. However, there have been some conflicting results in these studies, with some showing that autistic individuals prefer greater personal space (1, 2), while other studies found that they often get too close to others (3, 4). As I examined the studies, I wondered, “Why are these studies finding such conflicting results? What is being missed?”. One study (5) noted that social anxiety was a factor that contributed to the increased need for greater personal space. Social anxiety in the autistic population can stem from several causes, but two factors that I have found to be highly connected with social anxiety are misunderstandings in previous social interactions leading to uncertainty of how to approach future interactions and sensory processing differences. As this Instagram post indicates, my adult client relayed to me how
overwhelming different people’s scents are. As much as this client wants to stay and engage, dealing with different body odors is too overwhelming for their nervous system. However, growing up and continuing now, they have been told to deal with it; to ignore their body signals and remain part of the interaction. Autistic people have heard statements such as:
“It’s okay.”
“It’s not a big deal.”
“Just deal with it.”
So, what happens as a result? Well for some, these sensitivities are too hard to ignore. Their whole body is consumed by the stimuli, keeping them from attending to the interaction. Imagine trying to listen to a lecture on quantum physics while attending a rock concert. You could not. Or you would struggle immensely, missing out on salient points. And afterward, you would probably feel exhausted from the amount of effort used. The same can be true for those with sensory sensitivities, attempting to ignore the barrage of stimuli coming from the environment, as well as the responses from their bodies. How successful can a social interaction truly be if a person is dealing with a rock concert happening in their brain and body?
In addition to the sensitivities that they are enduring from the environment, often autistic people attend to and interpret social interactions differently than others. This difference is part of the reason for the previous unfounded belief that autistic children and adults did not want social relationships. That they preferred to be alone. Those with autism are striving to connect and build relationships as much, if not more than the “neurotypical” population. However, our society is pushing the neurodivergent population to live by the norms of others, while we do not consider their needs. Many autistic people have difficulty maintaining eye contact (see the post above) or may not recognize non-verbal cues, resulting in miscommunications with their social partners. These mishaps can occur more when a person is dysregulated after forcing themself to maintain their social presence.
On the other end of the continuum, many autistic individuals use a reduced amount of personal space. There are hypotheses about different parts of the brain that are involved with regulating personal space, but a common structure discussed was the amygdala (4). The amygdala is an almond-shaped structure located in the temporal lobe. Its job is to regulate emotions, especially aggression and fear. It is positioned close to the hippocampus, the part of our brain where memories are housed. Due to their close connection, when an experience causes a strong emotional response, that memory can be more intensely remembered. The amygdala uses sensory information to determine possible threats and damage to the amygdala, as seen in studies of autistic individuals, is believed to cause hyper-responsiveness. For individuals who have more sensory sensitivities, as my client described above, getting close to others can cause dysregulation.
This in combination with the need for increased sensory input and social learning challenges can affect the understanding of physical proximity. I have worked with children that overly touch, hang their bodies on peers and family, even press their chins into another person’s head for additional sensory input. Due to social learning differences, they miss the non-verbal cues that others are annoyed and are trying to move away. Even with adults, in the corporate world, I have encountered stories of professionals not recognizing the sign of others backing away from them as an indication that they were too close. There was one story in particular when a colleague attempted to leave the office of a co-worker. The colleague thought he was providing signals by back up to the door of his co-worker’s office, but the co-worker mistook this signal as an indication to follow and continued to walk with his colleague into the restroom.
So, you may be asking, well what do we do? Do you not teach those with sensory sensitivities about personal space? Do we continue to have misunderstandings about someone's intention based on their proximity? No. What I’m saying is that understanding personal space and what’s comfortable for both parties is a two-way street. We often want autistic people and others with social learning challenges to not get too close or to not move too far away, but it is prudent to understand their needs and challenges too. Are they seeking sensory input, like touch or proprioception, by getting closer to others? Are they moving their bodies away to avoid sensory input that is too dysregulating? Are difficulties processing proprioceptive input causing them to bump into others or things accidentally? It is only by listening to the person (child or adult) that we can learn and support their needs and struggles. Then we can truly have engaging, insightful and meaning interactions.
To help children learn more about personal space, Social Sleuthers has produced a bookisode on the topic. Watch a preview here.
Social Sleuthers' "Personal Space" Bookisode Preview
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Freebie: Personal Space Battleship
For more support with personal space, check out this fun freebie.
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References
1. Gessaroli, E., Santelli, E., di Pellegrino, G., & Frassinetti, F. (2013). Personal space regulation in childhood autism spectrum disorders. PloS one, 8(9), e74959. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0074959
2. Massaccesi, C., Groessing, A., Rosenberger, L., Hartmann, H., Candini, M., di Pellegrino, G., Frassinetti, F., & Silani, G. (2020). Neural correlates of interpersonal space permeability and flexibility in autism spectrum disorder. bioRxiv 2020.10.14.339291; doi: https://doi.org/10.1101/2020.10.14.339291
3. Asada, K., Tojo, Y., Osanai, H., Saito, A., Hasegawa, T., & Kumagaya, S. (2016). Reduced Personal Space in Individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorder. PloS one, 11(1), e0146306. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0146306
4. Lough, E., Hanley, M., Rodgers, J., South, M., Kirk, H., Kennedy,D., & Riby, D.M.
(2015). Violations of personal space in young people with autism spectrum disorders and Williams syndrome: Insights from the social responsiveness scale. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 45(12). pp. 4101-4108. http://dx.doi.org/10.1007/s10803-015-2536-0
5. Perry A, Levy-Gigi E, Richter-Levin G, Shamay-Tsoory SG. Interpersonal distance and social anxiety in autistic spectrum disorders: A behavioral and ERP study. Soc Neurosci. 2015 Aug;10(4):354-65. doi: 10.1080/17470919.2015.1010740. Epub 2015 Feb 10. PMID: 25666260.
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